This was the last thing I saw before I ended my sixty second recap. It will stay with me forever.
Buzzfeed is on a good roll right now. This week's piece about how media reporting has changed for the worse generated a whole bucketful of discussion, including this borderline manifesto from Tom McGeveran, of Capital New York. Because I'm only a pretend reporter, I'll refrain from throwing in my opinion on the shift in media reporting. But, as a pretend reporter, I have massive opinions on pretend things—like Smash. The Buzzfeed article that most amused me this week was about that show's trainwreck of a first season, and the bitter behind-the-scenes feuds that led to its trainwreckiness.
I've got tons of opinions about that—mainly that, while the article is brilliant, I suspect that Rebeck isn't the monster it makes her out to be—and you can read them here. I have also, for the sake of linkbait SEO metric development (LSEOMD), included a TV recap. Because my girlfriend will make her ANGRY GIRLFRIEND face at me if I watch the entire show, I have restricted my viewing to the first sixty seconds. Ahem:
:01—Apparently this episode is called “On Broadway.” I know that because there’s a title card that says “On Broadway.”
:05—It’s Katherine McPhee! Dressed up as Marilyn! In black and white! She still doesn’t look the part; she still can’t sing. I wonder if the whole season will be in black and white. That would be a poor decision of Rebeckian proportions.
:19—It’s not black and white any more. Rats.
:22—Marilyn McPhee is singing a song inside of what appears to be a diner. Presumably she is on stage…possibly on stage on Broadway? Hopefully the other people are dancers who can dance better than she can, and I will get to watch them dance.
:39—I did not get to see any dancing…yet. A title card has informed me that this is the Boston closing night. This show will never reach Broadway! Or will it?
:46—All of the actors are running around backstage, presumably to avoid the extreme McPheedium of this first sixty seconds. Almost over now, guys!
:51—Now I see dancing!
1:00—There was a shot outside the theater of K. McPhee giving M. Hilty a dirty look. I guess those two haven’t made up during the off-season! How nice to know that that tedious rivalry will continue into season two. McPhee’s song continues, still blandly bland, and I turn the TV off when the timer hits sixty. The last thing I hear is, “And if a duckling never swims, she’ll never become a swaaaaaaaan.”
Phew. That's enough for me. If this feature proves as linkbait awesome traffic driver viral game changer (LATDVGC) as I hope it will, perhaps it will become a weekly thing. But probably not.